We have a winner. I think that everyone can agree that Mattel showed the most new toys out of all the toy companies appearing at San Diego Comic Con this year. They had SO MUCH, they saved a ton of them for after their panel, causing us brave toy shooting soldiers to head back into the crowded trenches once more for a second round of shooting....and damn it was worth it! NEW Justice League Unlimited, new Retro-Action Figures, new DC Universe Classics and new Masters of the Universe toys that will make you a convert to the Matty plastics program. Here's what you'll find in the bottomless Idle Hands Flickr...
MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE expands their universe by leaps and bounds with army builders, giant Shadow Beasts, Snake Men and more testosterone than a normal human company could fit into the average line of action figures, leading me to believe that Mattel is run by evil wizards. Just a theory. Still needs work.
MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE PART 2 (After the panel)
JUSTICE LEAGUE UNLIMITED keeps on going, despite a fat hike in the price of single figures at Target. The solution? THREE PACKS!! Plenty of new heroes and villains we've been whining for coming to the pegs in the near future, so put aside some cash in a Mattel fund and prepare for the onslaught. (side note Mattel: I still want a do-over on the Thanagarian and Bwana Beast multi packs!!)
JUSTICE LEAGUE UNLIMITED PART 2 (After the panel)
GHOSTBUSTERS breaks away from the standard boys in grey to include looks from the second movie, marshmallow covered slickness, stacked book fighting action, fat ghost fighting kung fu grip and..umm..Louis Tully, Minion of Gozer. Score.
GHOSTBUSTERS PART 2 (After the panel)
DC UNIVERSE CLASSICS 6 inch action figures continues to WOW with no-brainer characters like Jonah Hex and Robin to surprises like The Creeper! Upcoming waves go heavy on the Green Lantern for obvious reasons with one branch covering the boys in green who fight the good fight and another with the yellow Sinestro Corps lying in wait, ready to cleanse the universe. We'll also be getting a little dose of Blackest Night!
DC UNIVERSE CLASSICS PART 2 (you get the idea)
DC RETRO-ACTION FIGURES bringing MEGO-esque dreams to life. The original MEGO line of action figures with cloth outfits was severely lacking in bad guys, so Mattel is looking to change all that right out of the gate. New additions like Captain Cold, Darkseid and Cheetah will make collectors scramble to pick up the pieces they missed, now that they are positive the universe will be growing leaps and bounds in the next year!
DC RETRO-ACTION PART 2
12 INCH MOVIE MASTERS began with a man called ZOD (which I still need if anyone out there wants to hook a brother up) and now continues with the original super boyscout from the movie no one will ever forget.
BATTLE FORCE 5 gives Hot Wheels a little more power in the front end and a little less junk in the trunk! Yea, I don't know what I'm saying either. They race..they fight..there's a cartoon. The kiddies think it's bitchin. They still say that word, don't they? I'm sure of it.
WWE dominates nearly one whole isle in Toys R Us, proving that men in tights may sell action figures FOREVER!! New schoolers hang alongside the legends from my youth, coaxing me to create imaginary battles between Hillbilly Jim and The Iron Shiek shouting "USA!! USA!!" at the top of my lungs. My Indian neighbors avoid me. Go fig. (note to Mattel: 1 Ultimate Warrior figure and 1 Roddy Piper figure every 3 months please. Thank you.)
WILD GRINDERS are wacky little skateboard dudes with their own cartoon...doing wacky things with a zany dog and..umm..adventures!! Yeaaa...I know next to nothing about this line but ...LOOK! SKATE BOARDS!!
BATMAN: BRAVE AND THE BOLD crank out characters we never thought we'd see in a kid's show with these odd octagonal holes in their arms and legs allowing you to peg in weapons creating SUPER MEGA JOKER and such!! They've also got the little mini stylized figures I'd own a billion of if they were just a leeeeeeettle cheaper.
MONSTER HIGH may look like Bratz dolls creeped up for the Hot Topic crowd, but the show is very tongue in cheek, reminiscent of Elvira and The Crypt Keeper in the 90's. These are truly the bastard children of the Universal Monsters who wear pinks and purples to make their parents shriek in terror. What scares the real monsters? MONSTER HIGH! Diabolical...and a bit genius.
GENERATOR REX is about a dude who can turn his body into weapons of destruction to battle monsters threatening to eat babies and Scarlet Johansson! OH NOEZ!! Yeaaa I don't know much about this one either (shocking there's a cartoon I haven't watched, yea?) but the monsters look like Mike Mignola creations, so I'm in.
DC UNIVERSE INFINITE HEROES is an odd duck amid all the DC Comics plastics coming at us by the truck load. They are Star Wars sized with fair sculpting and just the basic articulation, reminding me of the Pocket Heroes line from my youth. This was all fine and good until a price hike shut me out of the line. Honestly, I've got more than enough to buy already, so a line like this has to have the sweetest of price tags to urge me on. At any rate, the tiny DC Universe keeps building with singles and multi packs on the way.
BARBIE is something I must cover, because a good 50% of the nerds who demand my attention have breasts (the female kind), and when I tell them about Joan Jett and I Dream of Jeanie Barbies they can own and brush the hair of, they want to kiss me...and that is good. On the way are new additions from classic TV shows like Dallas and Bewitched, a tiny vampire movie called Twilight and a little retro-cable show called Mad Men. Barbielicious!
And now...top 10 jobs Barbie should take on next...
10. Hand Model
9. Transgender Construction Worker
8. Jersey Shore Barbie
7. Fake Skater girl who carries a skate board so she can talk to the cute skater boys
6. Jail Guard
5. Roller Derby Girl
4. Lady GaGa
3. Hard Drinking Police Detective who uses sex as a way to distance herself from her true feelings
2. Comic Con Geek Girl with giant tote bag, tight super hero t shirt, r2d2 watch and autographed picture of Nathan Fillion
1. Sarah Silverman